Some friendships in the NRL are built on convenience – the shared training schedule, the shared jersey, and the shared season. But Brian To’o and Stephen Crichton run deeper than that. They share a bond that survives the biggest moments – even when life split them into different teams, different tunnels and different colours.
But their story started long before the NRL entered the picture.
Stephen remembers hearing about Brian – who is almost two years older – before he ever properly met him. “We actually didn't meet in person, but everyone knew who ‘Bizza’ was.” Brian was the smallest kid in school but already playing above his age group, earning a reputation both on and off the field. What stood out wasn’t just the footy, though. “He was probably the only senior kid who would talk to the younger boys, making sure [they] were alright,” Stephen recalls.
Brian frames their early crossings a little differently – with less reputation and more energy. “I remember seeing this six-foot-five kid in year seven running amok around the playground playing basketball,” he says. “[Stephen] was always that guy who was so energetic.”
Between school, church and sport, their paths kept overlapping. Over time, those casual connections slowly turned into friendship – and that’s exactly how they became each other’s number 1 fan.
Growing up in Western Sydney
Stephen’s family had crossed oceans before settling in Western Sydney – from Samoa to New Zealand and eventually Australia. Looking back, he speaks with gratitude about the sacrifices his parents made to make sure there were meals on the table for him and his six siblings. “We didn't have much, but we had everything at the same time.”
Brian’s upbringing on the other side of Western Sydney followed a familiar pattern – Mount Druitt born and raised; afternoons spent outside or hanging around with the boys at the local pizza shop, and only coming home when you were called.
Sport was always part of that life, even if rugby league wasn’t the immediate path.
Finding rugby league
For Stephen, rugby league wasn’t originally the plan. “Mum threw me into AFL because she thought it was less contact. I wasn't going to get hurt,” he says. He even attended rookie camps for the Greater Western Sydney Giants while balancing basketball, AFL and rugby league.
Eventually, when he hit years 11 and 12, the decision became unavoidable – he could no longer chase three dreams with the same intensity. “I had to make the decision to pick one sport,” he says. Conversations with his parents helped settle it, and rugby league became the path.
Brian’s journey into rugby league started with a love of sport and a moment watching the NRL on TV. “I was more of an outdoor kid... always running around with friends and neighbours,” he says. But one day, watching the Wests Tigers sparked something. “That was when I first started watching [NRL] properly... and [realised that] hopefully one day I get to put on a jersey... and play in the NRL.”
A small act that changed everything
Their friendship deepened through a simple gesture that started one afternoon at rugby league training. Stephen tells it from a specific moment in the day: still in school, doing teacher’s aide as a plan B, finishing early, then arriving at the footy club early. “I would sit in the back shed by myself for three hours and sleep in there, wait for all the boys... then start prepping for the field.”
One afternoon Brian walked in, saw him sleeping, and left. Then he returned. “Literally 20 minutes later he walked in with a full plate of food,” Stephen says. And it mattered more than Brian probably realised, because Stephen hadn’t eaten all day. “From that day he ended up doing that every day.”
Brian tells the same story with more matter-of-fact kindness. “I always had pre-packed lunches,” he says. “So I just thought I'd come in and give him something to eat.” He doesn’t claim it as some big, defining moment. “Being kind is definitely free… it's always good to show love to anyone and everyone,” he proclaims.
But the simple moments like that are what built the loyalty that would define their friendship for years to come.
Playing together on the biggest stages
Their professional careers eventually converged at the Penrith Panthers. The first major moment came with heartbreak – the 2020 NRL Grand Final loss to the Melbourne Storm. “Feeling the pain and the hurt that we went through pushed us to exceed our levels and go again for the next year,” Brian says.
The reward came a year later with a premiership win against the South Sydney Rabbitohs. “Being able to win a premiership together is very special,” Brian admits.
The State of Origin adds another layer. Brian made his debut playing for New South Wales in 2021, and Stephen in 2022. “Being able to represent our state together at the highest level is pretty surreal,” Brian says.
Stephen frames it as rare – especially when they’re playing at different clubs. “That’s probably the only opportunity outside international footy where we get to rub shoulders again and play in the same jersey again.”
And then there’s Samoa – the jersey that means the most. “To put on the Samoa jersey is one of the biggest privileges we get to have as NRL players,” Stephen says. “To put that jersey before other jerseys shows how much we care about family and about our country.”
From Panthers to Bulldogs
When Stephen made the call to join the Canterbury-Bankstown Bulldogs, Brian was the first person he told. They were still playing for the Penrith Panthers at the time – the club where they had grown, debuted and won premierships together – which made the conversation a little heavier to bare.
“Brian was the first person I spoke to… I didn’t want him seeing things on socials and [not knowing] what was going on,” Stephen says. “He was the hardest person to tell.”
When reflecting on the news, Brian admits it was a little devastating, but he was happy for Stephen. “It was definitely the right choice for him,” he says. “I’m still his number 1 fan and still supporting him no matter what jersey he puts on.”
Different jerseys, same bond
The first time they played against each other at Panthers Stadium, it came with subtle weirdness – same ground, different colours. For 80 minutes, they were competitors. But once the siren went, it reset. Stephen describes the moment after the game: “No matter what team we play for, we're always going to be brothers.” Brian echoes the sentiment: “Different jerseys, but same love.”
Even the pre-game routine holds their friendship in place. Stephen’s phone is usually set on ‘do not disturb’ and very few numbers can get through. But Brian’s number is one of them. “Someone’s FaceTiming me… I can hear it through my headphones,” he says while shaking his head. “And I just know that [Brian’s] sitting under the posts FaceTiming me from the other side of the field.”
It’s a perfect example of Brian keeping Stephen grounded and connected to something normal before the game takes over. He knows that Stephen can feel the moment deeply, so he shrinks it and makes it more familiar.
Brothers beyond football
Their friendship now extends well beyond the game. Stephen is the godfather of Brian’s son, Atreus. “Atreus is Brian’s first son – and my godson as well,” Stephen says. “No matter where life takes us, there's always going to be one thing that connects us.”
Teams and jerseys can change. But being asked to stand beside someone’s child – that doesn’t. “No matter where life takes me and Brian… he always brings Atreus to our games… and I'll do anything for him,” Stephen says proudly. Brian meets that line with the same certainty. Stephen is “the second father” and he’s grateful for the safety that comes with that.
Trust runs both ways. Brian was chosen as best man at Stephen’s wedding. “It just shows that he trusts me with everything,” Brian says. “I've got his back for life.”
Brothers by choice
When Stephen calls himself Brian’s number 1 fan, it comes from years of watching the work behind the success. “I've been there from the start… I've seen things that other people don't see.”
Brian answers with a defining feature of Stephen’s character. “If I had one word to describe Stephen, it would definitely be real,” he says. “Everyone sees… a great leader, but I've seen him at his lowest.” What stands out is Stephen’s capacity for love. “His will to love everyone, even when sometimes they don't deserve it.”
And then he sums up the entire story in one line: “We might not be brothers by blood, but we'll always be brothers by choice.”
Different clubs. Different jerseys. Different schedules.
But underneath it all is the same thing – a friendship built in Western Sydney, strengthened in sheds and pre-game FaceTime calls, and kept alive by a loyalty you never have to explain.
